I said, "Yes, with all that is in me, yes, Lord, yes!!"

Two days ago, Jesus asked me how much I love Him. He asked if I loved Him more than my job. He asked if I loved Him more than a friendship that I treasured deeply. He asked if I loved Him enough to take up my little cross and follow Him. It hurt, but I said "YES!!!" and I keep saying yes whenever Satan tries to make me doubt it. I have to because I wouldn't be safe if I didn't. The Bible says that if we deny Christ, He also will deny us. Well, for me, denying Christ would be keeping any little thing for myself when Christ asked for it. So I had to deny myself so that Christ would not deny me. How scary it would be if Christ denied me!! I've been reading in Revelations and James and hell is not at all an appetizing place to spend eternity.

But giving up stuff that seems good isn't to bad, once you just turn your back to them and pin your eyes on Christ. And you wouldn't believe how much joy and zeal the Lord has given me in just two days. My mom and grandma keep commenting on how changed I am. Well, give thanks to the Lord, who has done a mighty work in me.

The Lord has taught me these things:

1) ANYTHING, no matter how innocent or good it seems, that is a distraction from complete faith, trust and obedience in the Lord has to be gotten rid of. The Bible says, "If your hand causes you to stumble, cut it off." That is pretty strong language about a part of your body!! How much more that would apply if it were something like a friendship or a job! God promises to give us every good thing, in His timing. We just have to wait for it. And believe it or not-we don't even have to wait that long to see the fruits of good choices, like with me. I went out on faith, quit my job and ended a friendship and already I have more deep, bubbling-over joy and peace than I have had in.....maybe forever!!

2) Discontentment is disbelief that God knows what is best for us. I had to be SO strict with myself yesterday. The day before yesterday, I spent mostly in tears because I felt like I was making SUCH a big sacrifice. But yesterday, during family devotions, I realized that if I continue to mope and groan about sacrificing for God, I am basically saying, "I don't believe You, Lord. You don't know what You're doing. I g...u...e...s...s I'll go along with You, but I think You're wrong and I'm not happy about it." HOW TERRIBLE that a puny little human would do that to the Creator of the UNIVERSE!!! It is so frightening how out of perspective we humans get, and then (!!!) defend our position!! So ridiculous...

3) I, and the rest of humanity, am attracted to things that stroke my ego, that make me feel good from a physical standpoint. But this isn't Christian. My sister Harmony, (http://truthtellergirl.blogspot.com) and I were talking about this and she came up with a very analogy. She said that friendships shouldn't be two people, holding mirrors and showing each other their own reflections but friendships should be two people holding mirrors showing God's reflection to each other!!

Hey, guess what?!! All my interests and desires have changed in two days too!! I now longer have any desire for music other than hymns and classical music (this isn't an issue for everybody, but I have had a bad habit of turning on loud, rocky music and zoning out everything, but worst, the Holy Spirit.) Also, I studied for 6 hours today!! I usually don't like studying, especially when I don't have to, but I just couldn't stop today! I was reading a book called, "The Cost of 'Choice'." It's about the harmful effects of abortion on women. It was really challenging mentally because it is a collection of essays, written by professional women (professors, lawyers, doctors, etc.) so it is very scientific and has tons of big words. I just loved it.

It is so amazing to me, let alone my family, how quickly the Lord has changed me. It is unbelievable and I mean that!! But with the Lord, "EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE!!"